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Today has been a tough week.  I won't lie.  One of the people reading this right now did a really hurtful thing to me.  I hadn't left my apartment all day on Sunday because I wasn't feeling well.  Andy was on his way back from a weekend away for baseball and I was cleaning some things up before he returned.  Upon his arrival, he came into the apartment, wanting to make a dash for the bathroom, but on his way, between my hug and the bathroom, he said is this yours? And he handed me a strip of paper that had this quote on it (highlighted):

Do whatever feels right for your conscience, but don't fool yourself into thinking that you're saving the world. (these may not be the exact words, I threw the slip away in an angry attempt to forget about it.)

Wow.  At first I felt completely violated that someone would go to that extent to print this out and hang it on my door (whoever it was wasn't bold enough to hand write it OR sign their name.)  Then I let it get to my head.  I was so excited to see Andy because we spent the weekend a part but our perfectly happy reunion was destroyed by someone cruel enough to want to put in front of my nose that though I think I'm doing good, they want to make sure I know I'm not doing anything to make any sort of a difference.

Did this person not have parent's that told them that they could do anything that they put their mind to?  Did they not sit through a hundred seminars as a child in school with the main point being you can make a difference?  Do they have any semblance of a heart?

So yes, it hurt me.  If you are the one who posted this on my door, this is my response to you:

I am deeply sorry if I have offended you or hurt you in any way by the things I have written in my blog.  I am very sorry that you don't feel as though you can reveal to me who you are.  But most of all I am sorry that you feel that you don't have the power to change anything.  I want more then anything to sit down and talk this through with you.  I would like to know why you felt so strongly about this that you felt like you needed to make sure I knew that I'm not doing anything to make a difference.  Better yet, I'd like to know what you're doing?
If your goal was to hurt me, you achieved that.
If your goal was to try to get me to stop writing, sorry but I won't.
You don't have to read it if you don't like what I have to say.  I'd like to point out to you a paragraph that I posted a couple weeks ago:
You can play devil’s advocate and you can say that I’m wrong with all of this if you want to.   The way that I am doing things might not seem like much, if it is at all, but please don’t make fun of me, give me a hard time, or criticize my actions of not supporting large businesses and injustice when sincerely from the bottom of my heart all I want to do is improve the life of another.  You don’t have to support me, but please don’t bring me down for trying.
In this paragraph I have clearly stated that I already know that I have no idea how much of a difference I am actually making.  But the responses of support that I have received after YOU decided to try to bring me down have shown me that there are so many people out there that care about these things as well.  I know that most people aren't reconsidering their entire lifestyle because of this blog and I know that I am not directly saving anyone's life, let alone the world, but I am using what little control I have to do what I think is right.  What "satisfies" my conscience.  So thanks for giving me the opportunity to grasp a measurement of how much of a difference I actually am making.  Just so you know, even if you don't care, other people do and I'm sorry but you aren't going to get very far if you don't think you can make a difference.
I'd like to encourage you and let you know that if you put your mind to it and care about something enough, you are making a difference just by taking an initiative!  The words of support that I received from someone in response to your note, "positive change has to start somewhere."

Why can't it start with me?

If you decide you would like to talk, please e-mail me or call me.  I'd love to buy you a cup of coffee and hear about your concerns.

Blessings,
Hannah